Step one: raise your glass
Step two: say “Cheers!” or “Salud!” or “Mazel tov!” 
Step three: take a drink and take your seat.

Ah… if giving a toast or speech at a wedding were just that simple – easy as 1-2-3?!  Well, it can be… or at least we can help take the terror out of giving a toast.

Since bridesmaids are usually the closest friends or family members to the bride and groom, it’s a nice gesture to give a speech or propose a toast to the happy couple.  Traditions vary, but in some parts of the country, the bridesmaids will generally offer their well-wishes at the rehearsal dinner and the maid of honor will speak at the wedding reception.  This isn’t set in stone so the bridesmaids can decide among themselves when to speak -- or simply ask the bride her preference.

If you decide to offer words of congratulations, here are three steps to a successful speech:

1. Plan Ahead
Unless you’re a paid motivational speaker or an in-demand stand-up comic, don’t grab the microphone and just start gabbing.  It doesn’t usually end well.  For the bridesmaid who tends to be nervous in front of a crowd (and who doesn’t?) you’ll want to have a mental game plan for the speech.  For some women, it’s enough to jot down some ideas on the bedside notepad in the hotel before heading out to the ceremony.  For others, the planning begins a week or so before the wedding and involves a detailed outline of anecdotes and memories to include.

2. Speak from your heart (not the bottom of a wine bottle)
As helpful as it is to plan, it’s equally important to remember this is a touching time and it’s all about the emotions – happy ones, that is.  So speak from your heart about good times you’ve shared and the importance of your relationship with the bride and groom.  If you’ve been through tough times together, just touch on them and move on: don’t spend the speech rehashing the gloom and doom.  Celebrate the wonderful weekend you’re having together.  But if you’ve already “celebrated” enough and had two or three too many glasses of wine, you might want to opt out of the toast so you don’t spill any stories the bride wouldn’t want her grandmother or family to hear.  It will also save you from slurring through a humiliating cry-fest in front of dozens of strangers. 

3. KISS (Keep It Simple, Stupid!)
When in doubt, shut your mouth.  Keep the toast or speech short, sweet and to the point.  Enough said.

Some of the most memorable moments during the wedding weekend can come from members of the wedding party who make touching toasts to the new couple.  Keep the three-step strategy in mind and your time with the microphone will be remembered… for all the right reasons.